Pardon me while I vomit

I just discovered this tab on the dating website that i'd never seen before. It's called "success stories". Hmm. Intriguing. I know that every other week, when i'm feeling motivated about losing weight, I like to look at success stories and before/after pics on sites like The Biggest Loser, and what-not. so i thought...let's check this out. (You want the tip-off that i'm annoyed already? i'm slacking on my grammar. not capitalizing. that's right. irritation equals laziness in grammatical clarity.) So i clicked on the link. Now, I guess some of the testimonials were okay. A few got me feeling hopeful and excited; a few were grossly sappy and cliche; but this one--this one...c'mon.

We met each other online on 2/18/08. For the first two days we talked on the phone for hours. We meet each other in person on the third day. That following Wednesday, I told her I was in love with her and she reciprocated the same back to me. On 2/28/08 I asked her to marry me. She accepted. Its been the most awesome and fantastic experience that has ever happened to both of us. Salt Lake City, UT

Now tell me----HROUUGUHAHHTHHHTHHTTTAAAAAAHHHHHHHH!!!
Sorry. That was me hurling again. Tell me that isn't for real. They pay someone to go in and write fake "testimonials". They have to. I don't know why that little blurb ticked me off so much, but man, it did!